Join us and a new friend to the show, Tommy Lee, as we journey down memory lane, discussing holiday plans and birthday celebrations that fall on the festive season. We also touch on the tricky terrain of the job market, emphasizing how crucial it is to have a strong support system when navigating career choices.
Ever felt overwhelmed by the negativity and disrespect that's become almost second nature in today's society? We've been there too, and in this chat, we tackle these issues head-on, discussing their impact on our daily interactions. We also discuss the often misunderstood term "soccer mom", highlighting how it has evolved, and the misconceptions surrounding wealth and happiness. We take a deep look into experiences working for affluent individuals, and how it's taught us that money doesn't always equate to joy.
Now, let's talk about work-life balance, time, and mental health. We've all had those jobs that pay well but drain us of our time and energy, right? We share personal stories of the struggle to find balance, emphasizing the importance of valuing our time and mental health above all else. We wrap up with a heartfelt discussion on respect, compassion, and the dynamics of giving and receiving. So sit back, relax, and join us for an episode filled with wisdom, laughter, and plenty of food for thought.
Thank you for stopping by. Please visit our website: All About The Joy and add, like and share. We'd appreciate that greatly. Also, if you want to find us anywhere on social media, please check out the link in bio page.
Music By Geovane Bruno, Moments, 3481
Editing by Team A-J
Host, Carmen Lezeth
DISCLAIMER: As always, please do your own research and understand that the opinions in this podcast and livestream are meant for entertainment purposes only. States and other areas may have different rules and regulations governing certain aspects discussed in this podcast. Nothing in our podcast or livestream is meant to be medical or legal advice. Please use common sense, and when in doubt, ask a professional for advice, assistance, help and guidance.
Join us and a new friend to the show, Tommy Lee, as we journey down memory lane, discussing holiday plans and birthday celebrations that fall on the festive season. We also touch on the tricky terrain of the job market, emphasizing how crucial it is to have a strong support system when navigating career choices.
Ever felt overwhelmed by the negativity and disrespect that's become almost second nature in today's society? We've been there too, and in this chat, we tackle these issues head-on, discussing their impact on our daily interactions. We also discuss the often misunderstood term "soccer mom", highlighting how it has evolved, and the misconceptions surrounding wealth and happiness. We take a deep look into experiences working for affluent individuals, and how it's taught us that money doesn't always equate to joy.
Now, let's talk about work-life balance, time, and mental health. We've all had those jobs that pay well but drain us of our time and energy, right? We share personal stories of the struggle to find balance, emphasizing the importance of valuing our time and mental health above all else. We wrap up with a heartfelt discussion on respect, compassion, and the dynamics of giving and receiving. So sit back, relax, and join us for an episode filled with wisdom, laughter, and plenty of food for thought.
Thank you for stopping by. Please visit our website: All About The Joy and add, like and share. We'd appreciate that greatly. Also, if you want to find us anywhere on social media, please check out the link in bio page.
Music By Geovane Bruno, Moments, 3481
Editing by Team A-J
Host, Carmen Lezeth
DISCLAIMER: As always, please do your own research and understand that the opinions in this podcast and livestream are meant for entertainment purposes only. States and other areas may have different rules and regulations governing certain aspects discussed in this podcast. Nothing in our podcast or livestream is meant to be medical or legal advice. Please use common sense, and when in doubt, ask a professional for advice, assistance, help and guidance.
Hi everybody, welcome to All About the Joy. We got Rick, of course, in the house, as always. We got Tony D and one of our new favorite people, tommy. But, tommy, why did your camera just change?
Tommy Lee:Now we look at up at you. I, because I had to move it because my other device, the Tony, said about charging it. So I'm like you know what, let me double check and make sure that this is charged. So I wanted to plug it in and charge it, is it okay?
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, no, it's fine. It just looks like we're looking up at you like this now.
Tommy Lee:Yeah, sorry, just don't look up my nose, yeah, okay.
Carmen Lezeth:Well, you know, I can only edit so much. So this is the first time Tony D and Tommy Lee are on the show together, so we've already did little introductions in the green room and they already hate each other. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. But, tommy, I have to tell you something that happened the other day. So I never name dropped with my clients. So my clients don't know each other. A couple of them have bumped into each other and they know that I work for them, but it's kind of like I really do a good job of never talking to my clients about other people. So the other day I was talking to one of my clients and I was just like, yeah, yeah, da, da, da da, tommy Lee, and it was so great to touch base with him again. And she was like oh my God, that's the first time you ever name dropped. Oh my God, what are you talking about? You know, in my head I'm like name dropped.
Tommy Lee:Yeah.
Carmen Lezeth:It was really funny. I was like yeah, no, no, it's not that Tommy Lee, but she doesn't believe me. She thinks I'm covering, so she thinks Tommy Lee Lee is actually my client. So we're just going to go with that. I guess it's all good, he was here.
Rick Costa:He was here first. This is the original.
Carmen Lezeth:That's right. Are you sure about that?
Tommy Lee:Because I believe me, I did my research. He's like, oh I'm sure Better than me.
Carmen Lezeth:All right, all right. So the first thing I wanted to ask Tony, because he celebrated his birthday on Thanksgiving. Happy belated, happy belated.
Tony D.:How was your? Birthday Thank you, thank you, thank you. It was excellent. I want to see my mom, I want to see my sister. My brother-in-law, my nephew, my niece hung out with them for the weekend Much needed. They pretty much made me come up there to tell them I need to get up out of here and just take a break from everything I've been going through this year. I'm grateful for that. Grateful, definitely grateful for family. Excuse me, it was like crazy. It was cool, I needed that.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, you had some cool Facebook posts too, yeah. So is it weird I mean, because this has happened more than once that your birthday lands on Thanksgiving?
Tony D.:That's the day I was born.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, okay.
Tony D.:Right.
Carmen Lezeth:So yeah.
Tony D.:Yeah, especially to my mom, and I've been told by my grandmother and one of my aunts that I'm the guy to interrupt the Thanksgiving dinner.
Carmen Lezeth:Wait, I missed that. Say that again.
Tony D.:I interrupted Thanksgiving.
Carmen Lezeth:That's kind of mean in a way, but you were blessing and they were grateful for you. Yes, right.
Tony D.:I got to back for the rest of my life.
Rick Costa:Mom was thankful that she finally got to pop you out. Thank you, I believe it, I believe it.
Carmen Lezeth:I think of all the holidays. If I had to be born on when it would be Thanksgiving. That's a good one.
Tony D.:That's a good question Actually.
Carmen Lezeth:So Joel's birthday. Joel was on. The show is on July 4th, which I think would might be another cool one as well, just because like as a kid, you would think everyone's celebrating your birthday, or whatever.
Tommy Lee:Right, I was thinking no, okay, I was thinking, joe, today.
Carmen Lezeth:No, no, no, no, no no.
Rick Costa:All the fireworks would come on. Well, I just found out yesterday.
Carmen Lezeth:Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Can't talk over each other because I am not that good at editing.
Rick Costa:I said, another good reason before the July is the fireworks might cover up the mom screaming.
Carmen Lezeth:That's true, that's true. That's a good one. What were you saying, tommy?
Tommy Lee:I found out that we might be putting Christmas Day on hold because my nephew and his girlfriend she's due around that time, so if she goes early we're not on.
Carmen Lezeth:Christmas. See, I would think that's a terrible day to have a birthday Christmas day. That's what I heard. That would be horrible, but what I've heard too.
Tony D.:I've grown Christmas babies and I got a sister. She was born on 4th of July, yeah.
Carmen Lezeth:Her and Joe Lava. Yeah, do I know, joel Dubay. We'll have to talk about that later. Tommy, because I know the name, I just don't remember.
Tommy Lee:I think he's now the president of Nesba, which there's no more Eastern Mass. So yeah All right.
Carmen Lezeth:Okay, we're going to go into the way.
Tommy Lee:Okay, that's another story for all the people, all the people, okay, so how?
Carmen Lezeth:was everyone's Thanksgiving. Tommy Lee, how was your Thanksgiving? It was great.
Tommy Lee:It was really. Yeah, really really was. I was kind of I was looking at the weather and I was like, oh, it's a great rain and snow up in New Hampshire and sleep. And then I got to drive home at night and I don't like driving at night and I had to take my oldest brother with me and drive 30 minutes out of my way to get him and then but we timed it perfectly the food was amazing, as always. My niece is a great cook, just sitting around and laughing with good food and you know old stories of back in the day and it was just fun.
Tommy Lee:It was just fun, it was fun. It weren't for once there was not 30 people, it was a small group.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, that's always good, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it was nice. That's awesome, rick. How was yours?
Rick Costa:Well, we were supposed to go to my son's mom's house, but let's just say it didn't happen.
Carmen Lezeth:So okay, we can just leave it at that, if you want, that's okay.
Rick Costa:He did come over at night with food though, so I was grateful, so it was good so all right, I'm gonna have to get that backstory later.
Carmen Lezeth:That's all I'm saying. I had a great Thanksgiving. I ended up doing some volunteer work, which is what I kind of always do on Thanksgiving and I had just been back home because I had to go to that funeral. It's. I was done with traveling, but I had a lovely Thanksgiving as well. It probably is one of my favorite holidays, I think. Out of all of them, I think it's the easiest one. And then, of course, you know my birthday, which is the most important, you know, but that's coming up in January.
Rick Costa:Just like that. Yes, january babies, woohoo.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, because woohoo. All right, so that's so funny. All right, I wanted to know if you guys had had any good or bad things you wanted to share. That has happened in the past week or so. Any news, anything good, bad, Go ahead Tommy.
Tommy Lee:I have good news, as you know already.
Carmen Lezeth:Yes, and that you know. It's kind of one of the reasons why I put in there. I was going to force you to say anything but so I got a job offer. Wait, you have to tell everyone that you were looking for work for a while, right?
Tommy Lee:Yeah, almost a year since January. Yeah, and you know, at my age and where I am in my career, I have the right to be picky. Of course I deserve to be paid my worth and you know I'm not but at the same time I understand where the economy is and where we are right now. So I'm flexible. But you know there's certain criterias that just have to be like I will not drive an hour and a half into the city anymore and an hour and a half home anymore.
Carmen Lezeth:I don't think I've ever done that in my entire life. But you lived in the city. I live in the suburbs. Oh, that's right. That's right yeah.
Tommy Lee:So it's close to home, it's 20 minutes out, it's a contract position covering for the HR manager who's going out on maternity leave, but it does have the potential to go permanent.
Carmen Lezeth:So congratulations, I'm so happy for you.
Rick Costa:So all you had to do was go on all about the joy and boom, you got a job.
Carmen Lezeth:You see what happened. It just happened, Just like the good energy. The good energy just throws it out there. Yeah, that's what it was, Rick. What about you?
Rick Costa:Well, you said good or bad. So, remember, I've been a little bit whining about my job because I'm like I don't know what's going on, who's where, what's where. Well, now I know kind of what happened. So the main building that they wanted did not get constructed properly. So I was like, oh, you're kidding me, so what's going to happen? When's everything going to be normal? And they said, maybe April? I was like April, I got here with this till April. Oh well, it is what it is.
Carmen Lezeth:But it doesn't mess with you, money wise or income wise, it's just a pain in the ass, that's all.
Tony D.:Yeah, I thought you'd tell the word for the most part.
Rick Costa:No, I went from home, but they just moved from where they were in one city to another city, to two different buildings. One was supposed to be temporary and one the permanent one. It was not up to code and now they got to redo stuff and they don't even have electricity there, you got to bring a generator. What is happening? So yeah, it's craziness right now.
Carmen Lezeth:It's just cumbersome for you though.
Rick Costa:Yeah, because I literally don't know who's where, what's where, like somebody would or something, oh yeah we probably have it, let me call. I don't know who's where it is, it's just annoying. Is it that much of ocean violation.
Tony D.:What is?
Carmen Lezeth:what is?
Tony D.:the building, and then you have to bring your own, like heater or ventilation or whatever.
Carmen Lezeth:I don't know Tommy. Tommy knows all about this stuff.
Tommy Lee:I'm gonna have to agree. I mean, you would have to be up to code with OSHA and you know all those violations, and you can't have people working in a building that doesn't have heat or electricity.
Rick Costa:It's literally just my boss. He's the only one that goes there.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, he owns a company's house. Whatever, tony, I know you text in or doing other things.
Tony D.:I was clear my bills out. Sorry, I got to pay my bills.
Rick Costa:Busy man tonight.
Carmen Lezeth:Actually I enjoy this, I really do, and I know you do cuz you always on the shows.
Tony D.:Oh, the people asked me to be there and it's not that it this time's what I can't be. I'll give it this past weekend More than anything. I give him when I'm at work, but if I've got free time I try to be there. I try to support everybody. I really do.
Carmen Lezeth:Look at Tommy, don't know you. So he's like he spreads himself to thin. He gets upset with everybody. But he don't get upset cuz he's not that kind of guy, but down deep inside he is. It's a weird thing. He's just crazy. We love him, but he local.
Tony D.:Right down, carmen says she loves me.
Carmen Lezeth:No. It's on video oh, there you go, lord. So, tony, any any good or bad news this week? I mean, you had a birthday, so it couldn't have been like super bad.
Tony D.:I have to tell you that this past month is good for a lot of things that need to be done and things cleared up over. With resolved this. It was a lot, and Rick knows a lot of what I've been going through for the past couple years and what I've had to get done and Between the move getting wait, wait, wait, wait, jealous, jealous, wait, what, what? Why does Rick know something I don't know because Rick been talking to me for the past couple years, he know what I've been going through.
Carmen Lezeth:Well, that's so weird because Rick be talking to me and he didn't tell me nothing about you. I see how this is. Who's gonna get in trouble right now?
Tony D.:You know about me having to move and everything. So that was the biggest fight in that move and he knew how hard I was trying to go through that. But I got to the move. I got things cleared up.
Carmen Lezeth:Well, let's give Tommy a little information. You just finished a divorce and you had to move out of your home, or something right?
Tony D.:Yeah, it was a fight I lost. Just being honest about it was a fight that I lost, so I had to move and it was moving Lasting. I had to travel out of town for a convention, come back and work and go back out of town. My birthday didn't come back and work. So it's been a lot. It's been very busy, been a progressive month. I will say progressive more than anything. But for some people who can't make it, and for others who have, make it. Excuse me, I try to get both sides of the story. You're either going to inspire or you're going to enforce something that somebody else went to when you tell your own Testimony and I enjoy that people have to learn how to get something out of being around people or Give a message that's going to inspire instead of being some negative on social media. I'm so sick. These negative folks up here is ridiculous.
Carmen Lezeth:That's for real, for real, that's for real, that's true.
Tony D.:That's what I try to push more than anything.
Carmen Lezeth:It's just social media. I mean, I know you spend a lot of time on social media, but this is one of the things that happened to me this week. I'm just tired of negativity in general. Like I have no tolerance anymore. Like people coming up with excuses at work for why they didn't do something they're supposed to do all the time. Like like, we have to have reports ready for our clients, right, it's part of what we do. So like not having that regular report at the meeting on a Wednesday that we've been doing for five years.
Tony D.:You know what I mean.
Carmen Lezeth:And and then the excuse is not you know what. I'm sorry, I messed up. It's well, sheila Didn't call Susan and then Susan told me and I thought that and I was. I have no Patience anymore and I don't even think that's about getting older. I'm just done with people being Irresponsible, negative people who push other people down to lift themselves up. So over you.
Tony D.:That's just on my desk, your clip. I want that out there. People who have to push other people down to get themselves up you suck, I'm calling you out. I've been like, yeah, are the weakest motherfuckers walking? Guys, we're in earth. And I said you let down, purpose it's really like it, down to put yourself up. You're the weak one. We ought to crab in a barrel your ass to the bottom.
Carmen Lezeth:Okay, that will be a clip as well, look it. But I think it says something about the society we're in right now. So right now, what's happening? It's 615 here on the West Coast and you know we don't really talk about politics here, but right now DeSantis and Gavin Newsom are on Fox News having quote-unquote debate. I want to be on the same wavelength of what you're bringing to the tape watching on Ted show. Yeah, watch it on Ted show.
Tony D.:Well, it probably be over by then, oh 90 minutes.
Tommy Lee:I'm pretty sure you can.
Carmen Lezeth:YouTube it or find it somewhere.
Tommy Lee:I mean, tony, you do what you gotta do, but I don't want to hear it in the background.
Carmen Lezeth:The reason why I bring it up is because I know that a lot of people are like all gunning to watch it. Rivalry fight thing, a Magiggy between Florida and California, and I'm. I'm so over it. I have a good aspect of it. I have not heard that what?
Tony D.:do you mean what aspect of California thing? I have not heard that aspect.
Carmen Lezeth:Well, it doesn't matter.
Carmen Lezeth:I mean that's why they're, that's why they're having this debate right, it's because they've been both like who's sorry, I'm gonna say it this way who's penis is bigger? Right, who's bigger is basically, and look it, I love Gavin Newsom, don't get me wrong. I live in California for a reason and I voted for him and I love him. But he, you know, even I'm like disgusted that this is even Happening, because it's not necessary. You know what I mean for me. But it's going back to that negativity. It's like we're all Harnessing, I mean even like because you're putting it on, because we all like the car accident. We pretend that we don't, but we all, we all gravitate towards the car accident, but we all, we all gravitate towards negativity and I don't know why I'm gonna give you the truth.
Tony D.:I really didn't give a damn yet about a lot of these politicians campaigner for the presidency. I think it's too early and I'm not too comfortable in any of the candidates.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm really now we're not talking about politics here, but thank you for sharing. No, I'm just saying, going back to negativity, right, that's what I'm talking about.
Tony D.:Internet, I'm saying it's everywhere is what I want to contribute to that, if you don't mind. I've been saying for years Disrespect is taking over society worse than politics, and negativity is one of the biggest aspects. Of people are very negative and disrespectful To this side. They've been that way, I, before the pandemic. They've been worse after. What happens? What do you?
Carmen Lezeth:mean by disrespect? Can you hone in on an example?
Tony D.:People have no respect for anything or anybody. It's terrible out here. Yes, sir.
Tommy Lee:I have to agree with you and I'm going to put it in the terms that I use, and I actually come and I learned this from Jerry, I think especially after what you just said after COVID, everybody is me, me, me, I, I, I. Yes, it's all about me.
Tony D.:And I know it's for anything else or anything anybody else has except for themselves.
Tommy Lee:Right, and I think it's gotten worse after COVID.
Rick Costa:Yes, it's interesting that this came up. I was watching Gary V on Twitch and one of the things they were saying was that in our generation it used to be the elders were the respected ones and the kids were like what do you know? Now it's flipped. If you're not young and hip and hot, you're nothing. And the old people, what do you know? It's reversed. He goes that's messed up. It's true, it's very true.
Carmen Lezeth:But I'm going to put a little twist in this. Like, as much as I agree with what you're saying, rick, our generation is the one that's raising these kids. Like I've had this argument before with parents I'm not a parent, but that's why I can see so clearly. That's how I'm going to say it People are upset with this other generation, but you, motherfucking, raise them. You know what I mean. Like you taught them.
Carmen Lezeth:You gave them an iPhone when they were four, so that they could be babysat, and then you're mad at them because that's all they do. Hey, Cynthia, how you doing she's like sorry I'm late, it's OK.
Rick Costa:That was actually part of it too. He was saying it was because of the technology. And nap, because the old people don't understand how to use the technology, so they feel left out. And the young people are like you don't know how to do this, so making them look like they're stupid.
Carmen Lezeth:I don't even know if that's true. That's an extreme, because we're not even talking about old people, we're talking about us and millennials versus Gen Z, right? I mean, all of us know how to use technology. I mean, I know what you're saying, rick, but I also think that's a cop out. It's not about technology. The whole great thing about the human race is that we're always progressing forward and moving faster. Right? We had color TV when I was growing up, as opposed to radio from back in the day or whatever, right? I mean, I'm just saying so. I refuse to use technology as a reason why people are disrespectful or negative. I actually think a part of it this is just my little opinion is it goes back to what Tommy was saying this me, me, me thing we really have. Like, what's that thing? Is it called pendulum? Not pendulum? But we've swung one way to the other.
Tommy Lee:Scale.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah the scales are, but maybe it is pendulum, I don't know. You go from one into the next. Pendulum is swinging. Ok, so pendulum, right. So I remember back in the day when I was younger. It was really all about like, I'm of service, I'm in the way I'm a kid, I need to be quiet, I need to really do my work really, really hard and try, try hard because I need to please other people. And then we're all like, no, we need to have self-care, we need to take care of ourselves, and I'm all good for that. But the pendulum has swung the other way, where it's all about me, me, me, me, me. We have to get to a middle place where you can both be humble and be of service and take care of other people and love other people and consider other people, be considerate, but also take care of yourself and understand that you are worthy and that you matter and that you should have self-care.
Tony D.:I agree, I agree you got to take care of yourself. You got to take care of yourself before you can take care of anybody else.
Carmen Lezeth:Wait, who did?
Tommy Lee:Tommy, just talk to. I was listening to you and I have Alexa playing in the background and I thought she was a little too loud so I didn't want her to overtake what anybody was saying. I was like introduce honey.
Carmen Lezeth:Introduce, we need to see who the person is.
Tommy Lee:I asked him to just lower it. We'll go, go go.
Rick Costa:I thought it was the dog.
Carmen Lezeth:I thought it was the dog too. That's what I was saying. Oh no, he already went to bed.
Tommy Lee:Oh my God, he's so funny. He looked at me and he's like yeah, it's eight o'clock, let's go. And he stopped, and he looked at me and he was like fine, and he went and he curled up in the bed.
Rick Costa:I'm done, I'm out.
Tommy Lee:That's a good one Good talking, I'm actually more upset.
Carmen Lezeth:I mean, it's kind of the same thing. I have no more patience for negativity. But it's also the lack of consideration of other people, the way in which and I'll say this till I'm blue in the face I am so disgusted by don't get upset, tommy, but I'm done with pet parents and pet parents who then look at other people, other human beings, like crap, like homeless people Like I literally watch every day when I'm here in California I watch people. They have their dogs with their outfits on or they're in the carriage or whatever, and they walk by a homeless person who is minding their own damn business, just trying to whatever exists, and just the nastiness, just you can feel the energy. I'm over it.
Tommy Lee:It's kind of like, that's kind of how I feel about soccer moms.
Carmen Lezeth:With their. They don't exist anymore. Is that just the?
Tommy Lee:Oh, believe me, they're out there with their baseball caps and the ponytail through the back, and they got their jogging suit on their pink jogging suit and drinking their latte.
Carmen Lezeth:It's not a latte. It's usually in the thing, it's all like yeah, we all know what it is.
Tommy Lee:It's not a latte.
Tony D.:The cappuccino.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, it's a cappuccino. Extra from Starbucks. Oh, wait so we are soccer moms, now Karen's. Is that what they are?
Tommy Lee:Yes, Some are.
Tony D.:Yes, some of them are yes.
Carmen Lezeth:And that's a good point that you just brought up See how things involve, how things change, oh, from soccer moms, soccer moms, and now Right, I mean I guess the Karen thing is people that want to talk to your manager and they just don't have any patience or whatever. But isn't being a soccer mom a negative thing, or is it not? Because I don't know what a soccer mom is Originally no. Ok.
Tony D.:That a stay at home mom is doing everything with the kids and the father's always busy working. Correct Originally.
Carmen Lezeth:Originally OK, and then it evolved into something else.
Tony D.:It evolved into somebody who's looking to live their life and I want to say as a dependent of their spouse which is cool because you're doing something with the kids. But some of them want to be drama gossiping. They pretty much want to do their board and they need something to do. That's what they start doing the camera crap.
Carmen Lezeth:Right, cynthia just said Starbucks with Bailey's. Hey, whatever works, baby, not what I hear you.
Tony D.:So they all drink your white Russians.
Tommy Lee:I mean, let's face it, if we could all stay home and be independently wealthy, I'm pretty sure we'd all do it, wouldn't we?
Tony D.:Yes, those of us that have worked absolutely. Yeah.
Carmen Lezeth:OK, here's what I'll say. I feel like, just because I know so many ridiculously wealthy people, that is an actual recipe for disaster, Because at some point you get bored, you have nothing to do and then you start nitpicking over the stupidest thing, so you have to find something to do with your life. That's what I tell people. It's not about money. I know so many rich people I have never in all my life and I've been here now 30 years this August I'll be here 30 years and I've worked for so old oil money, self-made millionaires who have nothing to do with the industry, Hollywood celebrities who had nothing, or whatever, or our Nepo children or whatever you call them, whatever. I swear to you on my mother's grave I would not trade my life or my financial situation for not one of them. People, not one.
Carmen Lezeth:And I have two of them that I think of my favorite clients. I still would not change Nothing Because I see money does not make you happy. It gives you choices, but it does not change the essence of who you are in the world. And do I think rich people can be happy? Sure, I'm not saying they're not. I'm just saying money comes with a whole other lot of problems, and if you're not OK with who you are in the world, a lot of money is not going to make that better.
Tony D.:That's the right level to go to with you, rick. Go ahead. Rick, I didn't want to cut you off. No, no, I wasn't saying that You're around the rich folks. So for those of us who are around the rich folks, let me ask you this They've got the money that we're fighting to get. Are they lonelier Mainly because they can't trust who they're around? Are they lonelier based on the knowledge that they have that we don't?
Carmen Lezeth:Tony, that's a great question. I'll tell you this part, I think loneliness it runs the gamut through everyone, right? I mean, that's part of the problem with social media and people being so negative is we're all pretending to have these amazing lives with our Instagram posts and our TikToks or whatever, but at the end of the day, the truth is probably something else, right?
Tony D.:I think they're showing the good times of their lives more than they're showing off what they don't have.
Carmen Lezeth:Right, right. So then we all start comparing ourselves to the best parts of Tony D, as opposed to actually knowing, maybe, what the truth is, which is an entire thing. So let me be clear. The reason why I wouldn't trade my life with any of the rich people that I have worked for all of them is because money doesn't solve the problem. I love who I am. I love the person I've become. I love everything I've done right, I've learned from everything I've done wrong and I feel really confident and secure in who I am. I don't think I can say that about a lot of the people that are my clients. It has nothing to do with money and everything to do with the fact that money is a facade. Money gives you choices. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying I would be like oh, I want the lottery.
Carmen Lezeth:No, I must be living paycheck to paycheck and I wouldn't take it. I'm saying that money isn't the thing that solves loneliness, or actually most of the people I've met, especially in the past. I had some pretty interesting clients who grew up with money. They had nannies. Generational wealth is very different than Hollywood wealth, very, very different. And I would say those were the loneliest people I've ever known, because it's not even that they don't trust anybody, but there's a Like. It's sad when I think about it. A lot of people thought I was their friend, like they were paying me. Of course I was going to listen to you.
Carmen Lezeth:I wasn't interested but you were paying me and I'm doing your books or whatever, and if you want to talk to me about what your doctor said and your daughter and your son, and I'm going to listen to you. But they would be like, oh, you're such a good friend, Carmen, and it was a weird thing because I'd be like, no, I know where this is going. We are not friends because they would fire me in a heartbeat tomorrow.
Tony D.:That's true and that's your mentality on the aspect of what you're doing. I got that point.
Carmen Lezeth:So money doesn't change loneliness or happiness, or it doesn't give you medical Like you would think, being able to go to any medical doctor and do whatever you want to do. You know what? My clients still died of cancer, suffered with whatever diseases, like everyone else you know, like all of these weird things.
Tony D.:I could do this for an hour. I could really do this for an hour. What for an hour? Do what? The question that I could ask you. From the answer you have, because I don't know too many people in that position, and a lot of times when we bring up questions about things, you'll notice how me and Brian will be like we know this, we know this. You'll be like really, it's both sides of the equation. The rich people you would think they had to earn their way up there. When they get there, you realize how many other people aren't. You're watching everybody else go through what they're going through. Some of the loneliness is, I mean look it, I'm not trying this.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm just saying in my experience and I can say I've worked with, I'm going to say, over 40 extremely wealthy people Over the years I've seen people who had nothing and then made it big. That's a whole other ball game. You would think like, oh there are the big ones. No, money can be very manipulative and powerful and you create bumps along the way. I'll tell you I worked for everyone knows I worked for brand new school and that was a young man who still has a company now and is very wealthy comparatively to other people like ourselves, and watching him go from nothing and become so successful was an extraordinary window of something. I will never make mistakes Because I learned from that. If I ever have that opportunity to go that route, you know what I mean Because I'm an enthusiast.
Tony D.:It's not enthusiasm.
Carmen Lezeth:Money has an ability because if you're not mature enough to deal with it, it changes you. Yes, right, because you think now you have power. But money power is bullshit power. Real power has nothing to do with money.
Tony D.:I think it has due respect.
Carmen Lezeth:That's all we done and that was a great show. Thank you so much, but that is it. If you respect someone, it doesn't matter how much money they have. All of a sudden, that's a real different kind of or somebody's really smart and is able to do it. Somebody's really smart and is able to teach you something. You have respect for them. That's going to trump any kind of money any day of the week.
Rick Costa:There's too many people that believe that they're broke or just wanted more, but they think well, if I was rich, I would be happy, and it's so not true.
Tommy Lee:You know it's funny. You said that because this is the third time money and happiness has come up in this conversation In different ways. You just said it, kamen. You said it earlier Money does not buy you happiness.
Carmen Lezeth:And I love that. I've had the experience because, like we say it as a cliche, but I'm telling you I swear to your mama there's gravy and I'll never say that twice, but it is so factual, I've seen it up close and personal. And look, it's not to say that we shouldn't want to pursue to have more money to pay some bills. That would feel so good. I am all for people making whatever money and developing whatever they want and creativity, and you know, you get your paycheck, do what you got to do. But the people. I'll tell you this one story that's actually a cool one.
Carmen Lezeth:So I worked for this woman who was very regretful of the way in which she raised her children, because she raised her children all with nannies, so all of her children are older than I am. Okay, she has since passed away. She was one of my favorite clients because we ended up getting really, really close. I worked for her when I first came out here. Then, when I got this big job at brand new school, she helped me with buying like designer clothing or whatever we be. You know we had lunch or whatever because I wasn't working for her anymore, and then afterwards I ended up. She became one of my clients, again because she opened up a nonprofit, you know anyways. So you get the idea right. So we did have kind of a more friendly, different relationship and she would talk to me about things that she regretted, which was that you know the way she grew up and then the way her children were raised and there was a distance between her and her children and it's palpable, you know what I mean. It's so palpable. And at the end of her life, you know, she did this really amazing, beautiful thing that she gave all of her money away to charity. Right, she had this foundation or whatever Her children who would never want for anything, right, because you're talking kind of like close to kind of warm buffet money. Right, this is what we're talking about in a way. Right, we're so angry about it, angry about they would never. I didn't touch their trust funds, didn't do anything.
Carmen Lezeth:But the amount of anger and angst, what they did, you know, because it was the principal to them, it was. You know, she did this to us, she didn't tell us and I was like that is some weird motherfucking shit, like I would have been so proud of my mother. I would have been like, wow, you know what I mean, but and it's to me, it will always stick. And I mean there's so much more I would say, but I don't want to be too ghetto about it. But they were also angry with the staff that worked for her because, well, we didn't know either. It's not like she told us all what she was doing, but we were so much closer to her than they were at the end of her life and they were so evil to everyone. So I just I say this because money is the root of all evil. It doesn't have to be, but if you're not secure in who you are, money has no friend or family. True.
Rick Costa:It's the love of money. That's the root of money and that's why he's pointing at me, because he knows I'm getting very safe Love of money.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, that was happening. Love of money? I don't know. I mean, yeah, the love of money. You're right, I think money is a tool and we should all want the best tool possible. You know what I mean. That's how I have learned my lesson from all these people is so many of the people that I've worked for throughout the years have such regrets. Hey, ted, how you doing? What's cream?
Tony D.:He always moves everything around me cream Dalla, dalla, bill y'all.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, ted Hicks is in the house. He opened. Me and Rick are always like why.
Tony D.:That's why I'm here.
Carmen Lezeth:But money should be used as a tool. And because I handle so many people's money, I feel like I've learned. That is the lesson I've learned is like, if you can see money, whether you have it or you don't have it, detach the emotional part. Tommy, I was telling you this the other day and I've told so many people this story. It's not a story, it's a saying. You know, we all say, oh, money don't mean that to me, I don't care about money. Yes, you do, because when somebody tries to offer you money or somebody tries to help you, we all like no, no, no, no, no. We all get into a crazy funk about it. If you really don't give a fuck about money, it's not going to hit you emotionally, whether you're giving it, whether you're receiving it, whether you're sharing it. You know what I mean. It's like that's kind of what I'm trying to say.
Carmen Lezeth:I have worked so hard in my life to just realize that that's the lesson I've learned. I guess I had to learn it. Working for all these people. You know, people think they can, like this other client of the day said to me what if I pay you more money, will you stay? Will you work a few more hours a week for me. I said what I want you can't give me. I want more time.
Tony D.:He doesn't know about to let him go. I hope he's watching the show. You know I said you went deep on them. I got where you coming from, but you went deep on her.
Tommy Lee:Really good point, like the reason. Like I said earlier, you know I have certain rules and regulations and standards. I am not going to do an hour and a half drive into the city and an hour to drop half drive because I need more time. That's right. That's four hours out of my day, you know. I get up in the morning it's dark. I come home at night after working it's dark. What do I do? I'm kind of what quality of life is that? When I come home, I throw a frozen dinner in the microwave because I'm too tired to cook anything.
Carmen Lezeth:Why don't you just have your chef set up your meals for the week? Yeah right, no clients.
Tony D.:You don't get enough of you, don't get enough value for the time spent is what you're saying.
Tommy Lee:Exactly.
Tony D.:So what if it was worth it? So you had less hours, you still had the same drive. Would you do it? Which goes back to what she was saying about time.
Tommy Lee:That's a really good question.
Tony D.:I appreciate it and I'm asking seriously. I've had jobs and I want to throw this out there. Yeah, it was only one time ever I felt like the money wasn't worth it. I was making more money than I ever made before, I had debts cleared, I had excess in the bank and then I got tired of the job and that's when I was deployed overseas. I was like I don't wanna be here anymore, I'd rather be home. I wish I could make this a home. I just don't wanna be at this location. So for a lot of people where the money isn't worth it, you're not enjoying what you're doing. Say you were to enjoy what you're doing. And there are a lot of rich people who get a kick out of what they are doing, where the money isn't a problem, but they don't have a problem with the money that they're making either. See, the two kind of coincided. What Tommy's actually saying is he's gotta put too much into getting the money.
Tommy Lee:I look at it this way. And the situation I was in. I was making really good money working in the city. I didn't have to want for anything. The problem was I never had any time to do anything. Yes, I couldn't take a vacation because I had to be there. I didn't have the time to spend, to just, even on a weekend, go shopping because, well, my phone's gonna ring and we need you to come in. Things like that.
Tony D.:I was 21, moved out of my home for the first time, was working two jobs. I had money in the bank and no time to spend it because I was too tired to go anywhere. Exactly so I fully understand what you're saying and, mind you, I only had an extra $250 in the bank at the time, which isn't a lot of money, but for somebody who was single, with no kids, living in a used apartment, driving a used car, yeah, I was right.
Tony D.:Yeah, right, right, exactly so I did it and especially, now at my age, the things you was able to get a job that paid you what you was worth and you had time on your hands. I think you would get something out of some of the comfortability rich people have If they are living that comfortably and, based on what Carmen is saying, a bunch of them aren't.
Tommy Lee:I agree with Cynthia. No job is worth your mental health.
Tony D.:I agree too, by the way.
Carmen Lezeth:Tommy Cynthia is the one who loves you. She's like he is so cute and adorable. I love him. I love him. I sent him she can't wait to meet you. You'll meet her. She's on our show. She's my cousin. She's actually my cousin.
Tony D.:She's your cousin, yeah, cynthia.
Carmen Lezeth:She's my cousin.
Tony D.:Y'all do look similar, though Y'all do laugh the same.
Carmen Lezeth:We don't look similar at all because we have differences. I told you we don't have a family tree, we have a family bush. Bush, we don't look like it was yeah. I know I'm not saying that people. Rick, why don't you chime in? You didn't say no.
Rick Costa:I was going to say if you can't enjoy life, I don't care how much money you throw at me. If I'm miserable, I don't want your money.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah. I'm not saying people are walking around miserable who are rich. I'm just saying I do know a couple of people that I think handle money well, you know what I mean. These two individual people happen to earn their money. They grew up really poor.
Tommy Lee:You know working in human resources, not to cut anybody off, but no true words have ever been said Like I've looked at people that I've worked with. You get to know them and you can tell their stress, whatever the case may be, whether it's about money or a home situation or a personal thing. Whatever I've actually said to people, you know what Go home, Take tomorrow off. Go home, Take tomorrow off, Decompress, We'll pay you for the day. My boss is looking at me like are you kidding me? Right now I'm like no, that's legal Work with me. It's legal.
Rick Costa:Please work with me, and that's a good boss.
Tommy Lee:I mean, I don't do it for everyone. I do it for the people who I know deserve it.
Tony D.:Agreed.
Tommy Lee:Well, look, here's the thing.
Carmen Lezeth:This is my mantra. I always tell my clients your commodity is not whatever it is you think you're creating. Your commodity is the people who work for you. I don't care what you're creating, I don't care what you think you're putting out in the world. If the people aren't there working, doing what they got to do, you have nothing to sell. Yes, so you're absolutely on point. I mean that's. You know, I have this conversation all the time and again. I have no patience anymore. So I just tell my clients, like either you trust me or you don't. So if this person needs a day off and they're not feeling well and they're sitting here suffering, first of all I don't want to get whatever it is they're sniffling about. That's number one. Number two they are exhausted, they are tired, they are doing half-assed work which is costing you more money. Dumbass Like. I get no patience for my clients, the more or the less.
Tommy Lee:The reason why I brought that up and the reason why I and I said this to my boss afterwards. I said you know, you get three bereavement days when somebody passes away. Yes, where my mother passed away, I got three days off. Wow, wow. I went back to work. I was not emotionally ready to go back to work. I just lost my mother Right and I was fine during the day. I'll never forget it.
Tommy Lee:But everybody kept coming up to me saying I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, and I just kept hearing it over and over and over again until I just lost it. Yeah, and one of my really good friends, who I'm still good friends with today, she's like no, no, no, no, no, you're going home. She called up, she called down to our manager Wow, the big guy, the big boy. And he said tell him to come down. I went downstairs, went into his office. He said this is what's going to happen. You're going to go home and you're going to take the rest of the week off and then you call me when you're ready to come back. That's right, that's how it works.
Tommy Lee:Never had I could have taken a whole week off, right, but it was like so I had a couple of weekdays and then the weekend off to regroup and I called him. And I called him at home because I had his home phone number and I said I'm ready to come back to work. And it's the little things like that that you do for people that people appreciate. And that was one of the most important lessons that I learned in my career and that's why I said to my boss listen, her cousin just died of a massive heart attack at 54 years old. He went to sleep and never woke up. I know it's not immediate family, but let's cut some slack here.
Tony D.:Right, you know what the job gave you. The job gave you respect.
Tommy Lee:Going back to what you said, respect.
Carmen Lezeth:Stephen said I've seen my manager cry at work from the stress of hire bosses.
Tony D.:That makes sense when I worked at my company.
Carmen Lezeth:I cried in my office almost every day, every day, and my assistants would come in and they would be like, can we get you anything? They were so stressed because I was like a basket case. I actually ended up going to the hospital. This was that brand new school, I don't even mind mentioning it. We were right at the beginning of becoming really, really big and I ended up having, I didn't know. Ben walked into the office. He was one of the designers at the time creative directors and he was like what's wrong with your face? And I had this whole side of my face was like hanging down.
Tony D.:I didn't know, stroke they got it, so they rushed to the hospital.
Carmen Lezeth:It was palsy. What is it? How do you say?
Rick Costa:it. That was palsy. Yeah, my mom's had it twice.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, and here's the thing I should have quit. Then I stayed four more years and the stress just got crazy. I was flying back and forth. You know it was ridiculous, but yeah, I would cry in my office all the time.
Tommy Lee:Another word I'd like to bring up. We talked a lot about respect tonight. Another word I'd like to bring up and we don't have to, because I know we're short on time, but maybe the next time Compassion. Compassion for each other, human beings, people in general, compassion for our elders, compassion for younger people coming up Ooh, that's a good one.
Carmen Lezeth:Can we talk about that? Yeah, there needs to be Compassion for younger people.
Tony D.:Put it on the list. It needs to be mutual. It needs to be mutual between both sides, 100%.
Carmen Lezeth:But does it. I mean you can't expect it to always be mutual. You have to be the person to do it so that other people will start to learn to do it. It's not going to be mutual because people are not doing it.
Tommy Lee:But don't we always? Go back to saying the same thing that if you want to be respected, you have to earn respect and you have to give respect. Yes, mutual, Is that what you're saying?
Tony D.:Yes, sir.
Carmen Lezeth:OK, ok, I'm going to say it this way, like if I don't know you, because nine times out of 10 when I walk into an office, I don't know anybody there I'm going to respect you. I don't need you to earn it. I respect you because you are a human being, but you will lose it very quickly if you choose to act like an asshole, and that's where it gets a little bit harder. That's what I'm saying. Like sometimes you do have to then turn around and be compassionate anyways. Like I might not have respect. The reason why I bring this up is I'm having an issue right now with a certain person. I have compassion for their situation, but I have no respect for them whatsoever. Like I'm done. I'm done with them. I'm done.
Tommy Lee:Thanks, impassion. I respect our two different. And that's why I said that's another subject to talk about, to bring up at the next.
Carmen Lezeth:Look at the sassy, carmen will come up. Hey, you know.
Tommy Lee:Carmen knows that I can get ghetto.
Carmen Lezeth:She didn't say ghetto, she said sassy.
Tommy Lee:I know. But I'm saying you know, I can get ghetto, it is ghetto, it is.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm going to say that sassy. I read in a book Compassion for Others is the key to joy.
Tony D.:I like that. I like that.
Tommy Lee:I like that. That's a nice motto right there.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm writing a book on all about the joy, so I'm just going to keep quiet. I just can't wait for that. Wait, what's that? What's that? Thumbs up thing.
Tommy Lee:She liked what I said. She agrees with me.
Tony D.:I like what you come up with.
Carmen Lezeth:I've never seen that before. Who did that?
Tony D.:I've seen it happen there, oh yeah.
Tommy Lee:They're like little emojis.
Carmen Lezeth:OK, I'm so confused right now. Rick, have you seen that before?
Rick Costa:I didn't even see it now. No, I didn't see anything, so on.
Carmen Lezeth:Tommy's screen. Somebody did like a bubble and a thumbs up and I've never seen that. I guess nobody likes us, rick, that's why I like Tommy. And when we say they, we know, it's just you know.
Tony D.:I've been on that podcast before and it's popped up in the rooms I was on on the other app too. That's something new that everybody's computers are.
Carmen Lezeth:I don't get it, but is it restream or is it YouTube? That's my question.
Tony D.:I've seen it on Tantino.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, so it's probably YouTube. It's probably YouTube then.
Tommy Lee:Yeah, but we're on restream though, so we don't think that I know you can do it on Zoom, and there's another platform you can do it on too, because we used to do it at work all the time, maybe.
Rick Costa:I just did it too Sick of laughing. We interrupted this whole thing for some pop up screen stuff, Because it was cool, I know it was Cynthia.
Carmen Lezeth:No, I'm just kidding with you, Cynthia. Cynthia's married and Tommy is lovely, but Tommy's not going to love us. Cynthia and I go talk later.
Tommy Lee:I'm bleeding. I'm bleeding.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm bleeding the fives. I'm bleeding the fives. I'm bleeding the fives Child. We all tried when we were younger. We knew it was over, there was no possibility.
Rick Costa:When Stephen said compassion for others is a key to joy, it makes me think of another very famous person that said it's better to give than to receive.
Carmen Lezeth:Don't even try to put Jesus all over you. In your sly, motherfucking way. I didn't even say his name, you did. Don't even try to sneak in his little Jesus shit. Keeps him $500,000.
Rick Costa:I tried too.
Carmen Lezeth:I don't want it because it's the truth, not alot, but I learned from your moron right, gotta tuvoeder pit depends upon what being is. I actually think we need to all get better about receiving. You need to be able to receive in grace. You know how insulting it is when you try. Imagine you get a gift together. You really put your heart and soul into it because you wanna help somebody, you wanna give somebody something, and you give it to them and they're like oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Thank you. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And they have to fight.
Tony D.:I'm gonna write this one down for the next topic too. Write this one down as well, for the next question.
Carmen Lezeth:Why are you trying to make me write this down?
Tony D.:No, no, no, no, no, because you brought up a good point. It's gonna be a great conversation.
Carmen Lezeth:But I do think it. Well, I don't know.
Tommy Lee:Oh, no, no, no, I see where Tony's going with this.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm on board with you. Why, tell me now we should have a minute.
Tony D.:Nope, write it down, you don't have time, that's it next week Polished, mm-mm.
Tommy Lee:Polished, even though it's going. Tony, cheers to you Even though I'm drinking water, but cheers to you, we're on the same page.
Tony D.:I will admit it's the way we made tonight. That's gonna be a great broadcast when we bring up a conversation. Same way. Tony's been honest and it will correlate. You will enjoy it. See, we're working with you. We're working with you.
Carmen Lezeth:Okay, I just feel like y'all hurting my feelings and oh.
Tony D.:We got you, don't you worry about it?
Carmen Lezeth:No, no, all right. Well, I don't know, rick, are you in on this too with the boys?
Rick Costa:No, I was gonna say that I freely admit I'm maybe one of those that has a little bit of an issue of receiving and I'm like just be happy, enjoy it, stop feeling guilty or whatever it is I'm thinking of.
Carmen Lezeth:I tell you where it comes from for me, Cause this will put a twist on it. This is gonna put a twist on it, and I don't mean to make anyone feel bad. The reason why I believe this in my heart of hearts is my mother died at 49 because she didn't ask for help, and I find it hard to believe, even though I don't remember her that well at all. I'm not gonna sit and pretend like I remember whatever. I cannot believe. If she was even one-tenth of the woman that people told me she was, that I believe that she was just even one-tenth that there weren't people around trying to say to her let me help you, Let me help you out with this, Let me do something for you.
Carmen Lezeth:Is there something I'm not saying? There's probably a lot of people. It was a different time, right, it was a different time. But when you grow up knowing that your mother died of a really stupid, stupid issue she died of a cardiac arrest due to asthma, something that even back then could have been taken care of and when you realize someone died so young, you start to rethink. And also, and again and you know me, I'm never gonna prop up my book my whole book is about people reaching out and seeing a little kid and saying let me help you, and me saying, yes, I mean begrudgingly as a kid, but still like you know what I mean. You have to be able to receive you have to.
Tommy Lee:Can I tell you something that I don't think you know? Oh God, Okay, go ahead. You know Michael. You know Michael Bonanno, right?
Carmen Lezeth:Okay, let's go with yes.
Tommy Lee:Okay, I'm actually with him in St Anthony's. He taught St Anthony's, he taught Abelarrows Michael. He's good friends with Jerry Okay go ahead. He's also a school teacher. Okay, for summer reading, he gave all his students your book to read.
Rick Costa:No way Wow.
Tommy Lee:Yes, he did. Wow, I should know who he is.
Carmen Lezeth:And he said I know you need Facebook.
Tommy Lee:I need to see a face.
Carmen Lezeth:We have this comment. I need a name.
Tommy Lee:I have a picture of him somewhere. I have a picture of him somewhere, I'll show you.
Rick Costa:That's cool, he's not on Facebook.
Tommy Lee:He is on Facebook actually.
Carmen Lezeth:Why didn't he tell me? You know, I was doing speaking events in Boston before the pandemic. I was so excited I did three.
Tommy Lee:Yeah, don't recall my phone ringing.
Carmen Lezeth:Hmm, no, no, I, oh my God, oh my God.
Rick Costa:He said no, no.
Carmen Lezeth:I went to do speaking events because of my book and then the pandemic hit. But I did not know that.
Tommy Lee:I didn't know that. I know I didn't think you knew it, but I was like you know what I feel like I need to tell her.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, it's great that you told me live and.
Tommy Lee:I don't know, I totally do you should have told me live, but I have no idea who it is I want you to think of it, and I know you're not going to think about this, because when they came back and he, you know, discussed it with his class, how many lives do you think you may have changed?
Tony D.:She's about to blush. I can't wait. She's about to blush. Think about that.
Rick Costa:It's like that movie, it's a wonderful life. You have no idea, carmen, can I tell you something?
Carmen Lezeth:Oh my gosh.
Tony D.:Your book is going to do what you told us to end in this one it's going to be forever.
Carmen Lezeth:There's this new thing here on this program where I can turn around and I can block you all off easily.
Rick Costa:Look at Cynthia.
Tony D.:I didn't see that in for a car. You didn't see this one. You were the one who told me to be careful how I come across and how I be careful to project myself and look at the impact you had that you didn't even then realize. Go ahead and cry. What is it you want me to do? Go ahead and cry.
Carmen Lezeth:No, wait, wait, wait. Here's the thing. What is it that you? I didn't know that Michael did that. I feel bad. I don't remember who he is, so I need you know. I talked to Tommy on the phone, which you could have shared this on the phone with me, but that's OK.
Tony D.:Good job, Tommy Cheers.
Carmen Lezeth:Just saying like I need you know, there's a lot of people that I don't remember, for a very real reason. There was a lot of people back then that were around us and watching us perform and working with us and that we were part of groups with. Like I don't remember everyone.
Carmen Lezeth:You were young and I was young, I was really young. So I'm feeling bad, like here's the thing I don't want to be. Of course, I know how many people's lives yeah, I'm not going to say that I know how many people have affected me and helped change my life and my hope and my try and my goal every day is to be the best person I possibly can and give back and pay it forward Because and that's what we're talking about, right? People were so compassionate about me. These are blue-collar working people who didn't have extra money, who didn't have extra presents at Christmas, who didn't have extra food to give away, who didn't have extra money to go buy clothes or costumes, makeup, all the things, all the dance shoes, all the things we needed, leotards, whatever and you know what? All these people Lara Wall is a great example. Lara Wall's family.
Tommy Lee:Yeah.
Carmen Lezeth:Turned around and they saw a kid and turned around and said you know what? We're going to make sure she has a Christmas. We're going to make sure she has a couch. They didn't have an extra guest house or guest room or a pool house and I am always going to be grateful for that.
Tommy Lee:They were always known as the walls and they will always be known as the walls.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, the walls.
Tommy Lee:They were always known as the walls, and I was circle. Everybody says, oh yeah, the wall, oh yeah, you know they were amazing. Everybody knows the walls.
Carmen Lezeth:But I mean, I will receive compliments and that's kind of a different thing like what you guys are. It's not that I get bashful about my book. The reason why I don't push my book is because for me it wasn't meant to be a book, so in a way it feels like a fraud. I tried to explain this to Rick and Rick you understood what I was trying to say. I wrote the book, I wrote letters to individual people, someone told me to make it into a book and so I did. Gotcha.
Tony D.:But it wasn't an intention.
Carmen Lezeth:It was not, jerry.
Rick Costa:It was a thank you to the people in your life.
Tommy Lee:Jared. I'm sorry, I didn't say Jerry, I said Jared.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, that's the Names will be changed to protect, right. I don't remember everybody's names I changed it to, but Jerry is Jared right, is it Jared yeah? Now I had to change names really fast because legally I wasn't going to go finding everybody to do it.
Tommy Lee:When I read that chapter I was like she's talking about Jared. I know she's talking about it.
Carmen Lezeth:People who knew, knew their chapters, or the people that we were talking about.
Rick Costa:Change names, change genders.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, well, no, that was just one person who's gender. And then she was mad at me because I did. I'm like you want to be anonymous all the time and now I do it in the book and you get mad. So I was like I can't win either way. And actually I just spoke to her the other day.
Rick Costa:That was so funny, but If I understand correctly, it was more like thank you to all the people that were there for me and help me out. That's really what the book was about.
Tommy Lee:Yes, that's what I got out of it.
Carmen Lezeth:Yes, that's what the book was about 100%.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, and I'm writing the second book to Canela and have a name for it Not going to tell you, but I do have a great name for it and surprise us. I like surprises, yeah. And then it's a much more intentional story and it's about what happens next. And again, see, now, if I had a lot of money, that's what I would spend my time doing for the next three months. Like if I had enough money to cover for the next three to six months my rent, my food, whatever, like what I'm making now, and I could leave my clients. I would, just, I would. I would have two shows a week. You know what I mean. I would hook us up doing what we're doing. I would turn around and then just work on these two books the All About the Joy book and the continuation to Canela, because it's so hard to do it when you're working 40, 50 hours a week?
Carmen Lezeth:Right, and that's what money gives you is choices and opportunity. You know it's not going to make me happy, but four day weekend, at least for some people.
Rick Costa:You know Thanksgiving we had to off whatever. I was like I'm able to sleep. Now more I, my mind is in a better place, my creative juices were flowing when I'm like, oh wow, I got all these ideas I didn't even realize I didn't have because I was so tired of the time.
Tony D.:I'm not the creative juices flowing. Even when I do my broadcast, I try to do until I can feel a comfortable vibe to put out there what I want to put out there. And I've always told, I've always said that before. So I get that entirely. You don't have a relaxation moment and, rick, I know you got more going on to just work on this. So the trip that you have going on to work just being on the issue no disrespect, you know what I'm saying.
Carmen Lezeth:Yeah, oh, are we hiding something?
Tony D.:Well, we don't put a lot out there, but we know what's going on. You and I both know what's going on, Rick. I'll start a work.
Carmen Lezeth:I'm so confusion. What are we talking about? His mom keep it offline.
Tony D.:Thank you, that's all. He talks about it all the time. I let him talk about it.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, I'm so sorry. Is that what we're talking about, not the time of the place?
Tony D.:The money.
Carmen Lezeth:He talks about it all the time.
Tony D.:So in my opinion, yes oh.
Carmen Lezeth:OK, ok, tommy Rick takes care of his mom. We all know.
Tommy Lee:Oh.
Carmen Lezeth:I know that Now, I do know. I know. That's why I'm confused. Why are we keeping it?
Tommy Lee:Well, you know my respect level for Rick just went up 10 more points yeah. I have a lot of respect for a son who takes care of his mother because, believe me, I did it for many, many years.
Carmen Lezeth:I know what it's like. It's not hiding a different thing.
Rick Costa:No, no, no, no. And dementia is no joke.
Tommy Lee:Oh, that's even worse.
Carmen Lezeth:Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now I feel bad, like I feel like I have a little club in shit and you guys don't like have all these secrets, like doing very alone.
Tony D.:We have broken into the world, just stop.
Carmen Lezeth:I feel like I made connections with people and now I'm being left out of the group. No, all right, we're going to jump off because you have another show, tony D.
Tony D.:I do not.
Carmen Lezeth:Yes, it's going to be on at 7 15.
Tony D.:Just have the message.
Rick Costa:You won't be able.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, so we're going for another hour Just we are not going to be on for another hour.
Tommy Lee:I have to go.
Tony D.:Yes, he has to do so. He said he won't be able to make it, so I need to you know, I just have to do the rest yes.
Carmen Lezeth:Oh, baby. Ok, no, you don't.
Rick Costa:Are we in the book?
Carmen Lezeth:Are we in the book of volume number two?
Tony D.:Oh hell to the world I would be in it.
Carmen Lezeth:Hell to the no Lord. I'm happy people. That's a whole book all by itself.
Tony D.:Yes, it's a movie. It's a movie, trust me.
Rick Costa:Yeah, it's the DVD extra specials that come out later.
Carmen Lezeth:So before we go, let me just say a few things, first of all, to my guests. Thank you so much. My cohosts, I adore you. Rick Costa, tony D Thank you. Tony D is going to be on the show on a regular basis, right? We're doing it once a month, third Thursday of the month. We'll see you then, tommy, welcome to the show, and I'm so glad and you're going to try to jump on even next week, right with with the other crew, if we can get you in. So I'm going to have Tommy pop in when he can. So, thank you so much.
Carmen Lezeth:I also want to give a shout out to a few other people. I want to say thank you to everybody on Facebook who joined today. I don't know what happened. Something happened where a bunch of people just joined the Facebook page. Very grateful, very grateful for a couple of people who joined on YouTube. Thank you. And you know I'm going to give my shout out to my LinkedIn people. Thank you, thank you, thank you. We're getting a lot of people. That's it, thank you everyone, and remember it's all about the joy and we'll see you next week. Goodbye, everyone, see you night.
Tony D.:all Peace y'all.
Carmen Lezeth:Thanks for stopping by. All about the joy Be better and stay beautiful. Folks have a sweet day.